Written by me, Simcha Sher, this guide is a love letter to the Jewish women’s practice of candle lighting.
 
The first time I lit Shabbat candles was at my Reform Bat Mitzvah. I stumbled over the prayers but felt proud as I looked at my grandmother Blanche’s proud, wrinkled face. The second time I lit candles I was 19, on a Jewish learning trip in Israel that began a lifelong journey of becoming more observant. I remember lighting those candles in the middle of Jerusalem winter and feeling that fleeting, inspiring, spiritual presence. I committed then to return again and again, each Friday evening, to this practice.
 
Now, I light each Friday night while grubby three-year-old fingers tug at me to help with a snack. In honor of every woman who lit before me, in honor of my Grandmother Baila Hendel bas Dora, I present for you—my village—this guide.
 
This guide is meant to meet you wherever you are in your journey. It’s meant for 12-year-old me who knew little, 19-year-old me who knew much, and 31-year-old me who knows enough to know I’m just a beginner again. All of us deserve nourishment for our Jewish practice. Whether you barely know how to say the blessing, or you’ve been lighting for decades but struggle to bring meaning to this weekly ritual—this guide is for you.
 
You’ll learn the history, the symbolism, and the beauty behind this ancient ritual, all wrapped in warm, accessible language that honors tradition without assuming you already know everything. Inside, you’ll find a heartfelt mix of practical how-tos and spiritual reflections, to what to say, to how to approach the moment with intention.
 
You’ll get:

• Step-by-step instructions for how to light (and why we do it)
• Mantras, meditations, and mindset tips for grounding yourself
• Blessings in Hebrew, English, and transliteration
• Insights into Jewish femininity, resilience, parenting, and fire
• The opportunity to access a moment of calm, courage, and connection,every single week
 
Now more than ever, the magic of candle lighting offers us a low-barrier, high-reward way to feel connected—spiritually, emotionally, and Jewishly. Supporting me, a Jewish creator, is just a bonus mitzvah point for you!
 
Let’s light together.